Sick Days Policy
We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness.
If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Casual Leave Policy
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.
Toilet Use Policy
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.
At the end of the three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.
After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the “Chronic Offenders Category”.
Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company’s mental health policy!
You are allowed to use the rest room only thrice a day and you have to swipe in and out from the toilet doors also.
E Mail Policy
Don’t read junk, forwarded and cc’ed emails.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company.
We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
All questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.